Obsess ?

This is me with my phone's cam. Though the quality is not clear.

Thursday
Thursday. I did not manage to go online at night, at home. Why ? I'll tell you way... not now but later. Moral Education class, I purposely woke up early yesterday, planning to go college early so that I can use the PC to finish up my Moral assignment, slept quite late the night before as I was busy doing my assignment, slept around 2 in the morning. Thanks to Shaz I manage to get some points to do Abortion. Yea, I did Premature Sex too last night, how cool ! At least better than ISA. People, abortion and premature sex were just my assignment topic la. Anyway, my group mate came late and end up we spending time doing it during the class on. Luckily Mr Abdul Razak is ok with it.

Went to M-Cafe, the secret air-cond room for lunch. Alissa brought her high schoolmate along, name Yong Jay. Shaz came after that and met up with everyone. A cool meeting. Stephanie and William and also Scott also came in after that. Was 2 hours late for work but who cares ? Haha ! I was damn lazy yesterday.

Went to Pyramid with June to meet up Sabrina and Yao Wei, supposedly to watch Harry Potter but the last screening was at 5.30 pm so we missed it. By the time me and June finish working and studying is already 6 in the evening. Went to Genki Sushi and shop around and had some chit chat after that in Starbucks. I spent too much yesterday.

Before going home, we went to LG house and met up with some hospitality friends. They drank some 47% alcoholic drinks, and I got a bit shaky after drinking a sip. I am not a good drinker.

Reached home 3 minute before 12. Luckily daddy did not lecture me.

Friday
Today, nothing much happened. Went for Miss Thong IT replacement class. Then went to work. Basically nothing much to do but just felt tired. This morning, when I went to bath, I bath with my eyes close. I slept in the mamak. I guess I look ugly with my mouth opened. Lol.

************

I wanted to post this long time ago, I always think about it :

Yes, I know I am too obsess to myself,
I admit.
Just for your information, if you have not notice,
I changed my header already.
Instead of "New Blog, New Style, New Life"
I changed it to "I'm a NARCISSIST,I'm very NARCISSISTIC ;I'm just TOO OBSESS to myself,Is it a PROBLEM to you ?"
Yea, too obsess...

I don't know why,
since form 2 I started taking care of my look,
since form 3 I have my comb in my pocket all time,
since form 4, when I first hold the family digital camera, I started camwhore
since then, I became very obsess of myself.

I always thinks that I look cool,
I always thinks that I look nice,
I always feels that I am handsome,
but when I look at a reflector,
I will scare myself out !
Seeing the real life me,
the ugly me...
My fantasy look will disappear straight away !

I used to wish that I am a singer,
which I can't sing;
I used to wish that I am an actor,
which I can't act;
I used to wish that I am a model,
which I am not fit and tall enough;
I used to wish that I will be famous,
which I don't think this will ever happen.

Everytime when I walk on the street,
when people look at me,
I will thinks that the fella likes me.
With is actually not,
I guess the fella was thinking,
"this is a weird fella with ugly feature, who thinks that he is so cool"
Yes, I act cool, so ?

I know I don't look nice with the acting cool face,
and I know either I don't look nice with smiling face.
I know it cause I took pictures before.
Some people looks cool when they smile
some people looks hot when they act cool
but me, haha, don't think about it !

People have talent.
Some can speak well,
some can act,
some can sing,
some can pose,
some good in sport,
some good in games,
some good in studies,
some have great fashion sense,
some have great communication skills,
some have lots of cool friends !

Which I don't think I have.

I can't believe I did it again !
I actually squeeze my pimples again.

Which makes me look ugly again.
I don't know what else to say.

I am useless ?

No !

I am not useless,
but I can't find myself...
Yes, I can't seems to find my shadow,
which is suppose to follow me wherever I go.

p/s : Please don't love me, I think I am not worth being love, do I ?

*i just can't find it, don't know why...* [J]